NOW I'm old....

Why is it, when all of my life I felt old, then at 30 started to feel young again and still do at 40, yet the one thing that makes me feel the reality of forty is that thing they call the Mammogram. I thought if I could avoid it, I'd still be young. But the M is a tell-tale milestone of many things; health, less tissue density, it's time, and oldness. I am stressed. I am going to my first M today and I am not looking forward to it. It wouldn't be such a rush to go, except I now have a family history, have felt tense areas under my arms and well, I have found what seems to be a lump. I am really nervous and am going to face this breast on. My frontal projections have caused me misery, joy, pain, and to love - and while I am not looking forward to this type of pain, it has to be done. Super idea for a Saturday. Be back soon..